Republican Sex Lives: Gabriel Schwartz meets Robbin’ Hooker

“In an interview filmed the afternoon of Sept. 3 and posted on the Web site LinkTV.org, Schwartz was candid about how he envisioned change under a McCain presidency.

“Less taxes and more war,” he said, smiling. He said the U.S. should “bomb the hell” out of Iran because the country threatens Israel.

Asked by the interviewer how America would pay for a military confrontation with Iran, he said the U.S. should take the country’s resources.

“We should plant a flag. Take the oil, take the money,” he said. “We deserve reimbursement.”

A few hours after the interview, an unknown woman helped herself to Schwartz’s resources.

The theft happened at the Hotel Ivy, a luxury hotel in downtown Minneapolis. (The Colorado delegation was housed at the Four Points Sheraton, several miles away on Industrial Boulevard Northeast.)

The theft occurred early on Sept. 4, hours after Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin gave her speech accepting her party’s vice presidential nomination. A police report said Schwartz told officers he met a woman at the bar and took her to his $319-a-night room.

“Victim reported suspect made victim drinks, told him to get undressed, which is the last thing he remembers,” a police narrative said. “Upon waking, victim discovered money, jewelry gone; total loss over $120K.” ” source

Couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy!  Thanks, Richard for the heads up.  You made my day!

UPDATES!  Were you wondering what KIND of lawyer he is? Follow this Link, but be sure to have napkins handy for your tears of mirth and dribbled beverage.  Thanks to Graham Lineham for that gem, and this one where you can hear Schwartz’s insane political views straight from the horse’s ass.  I mean mouth.

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9 Responses to “Republican Sex Lives: Gabriel Schwartz meets Robbin’ Hooker”

  1. Richard Says:

    My pleasure. It just makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, doesn’t it. 🙂

  2. apophaticattic Says:

    I know! Republicans in flagrante delicto is such a tasty dish, especially for breakfast… Makes you smile the whole day through.

  3. Paul Says:

    It is a poetic turn that a man stupid enough to bomb Iran proves himself stupid enough to let a hooker make the drinks.

  4. James Says:

    Absolutely unbelievable. My cheeks hurt from laughing so much, I spilt my glass of wine! Thank you for this !

  5. Brian Says:

    Paul sent me by to check out social issues.

  6. Nader Says:

    Who voted for such a stupid boy ?

  7. helist Says:

    I find it odd that the “Robbin” in question was referred to as a woman. Mr. Schwartz is a republican delegate, didn’t you say?

  8. apophaticattic Says:

    @ Paul, James, and Brian, thanks for dropping in. 🙂
    @ Nader, we’re all wondering outside the US who votes for Republicans.
    @ helist, well he SAYS it was a woman, but we’ll never really know, will we? Could be anything, knowing Republicans. Could have been a particularly clever golden retriever.

  9. Track Jacket Says:

    luxury hotels are always expensive but they offer some very attractive features and packages ;-*

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